Horoscopes and Blogging

I don’t know what it is with this blogging thing. Either I struggle to come up with something to write about, or I don’t have enough time to write everything and still keep things current. Now, I know I tell old stories a lot, but that’s from years ago. Telling an old story from last week just seems weird to me.

Of course. Now that I write that, the fact that it seems weird to me is weird to me.

Anyway. I have a lot to say lately. Right now I would like to talk about today’s horoscope. (This is a great example of a story that just wouldn’t feel right if I were telling it in, say, July.)


Do you fucking believe that? What kind of bullshit horoscope is that? Smoking Baby has mistaken me for Job (Juh-long O-buh) and is going so far as to poke at me from the Metro’s puzzle page. You know how much that puzzle page means to me. Plus, if you’re up to date on the blog, you know that I recently broke up with my mother, and I am positive that she was offended. If not by the actual breakup, then certainly by the incidents I mentioned during the breakup. At the very least she was offended by my language.

But the thing is:

Well the things are:

1) Sagittarians are infamous for their bluntness and for saying things with a tone that is frequently misinterpreted. We spend a lot of time either feeling guilty about hurting someone’s feelings, apologizing for hurting someone’s feelings, or unintentionally hurting someone’s feelings. So, in one way this can be seen as the Metro astrologer lady just being lazy. Because, on any given day that I’ve interacted with other people, there is a 1 in 5 chance that I’ve offended one of them without meaning to, or even realizing it. Being offended is disappointing. Ergo — lame ass horoscope.

2) My mother is also a Sagittarian. I wonder if she read her horoscope today.

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